I'm a pisces, but I had cancer!

Hello remaining readers! As we weather tropical storm Isaias, I am chilling at home after a new treatment yesterday after what was an exhausting and emotional few weeks. This blog post may be meandering as a result. I'm processing a lot and am just going to try and get it out on the page, so please bear with me. But let me start somewhere. Along with my once-every-three weeks immunotherapy, I had yet another a new treatment yesterday. My oncologist started me on an infusion called Zometa, which is a bone-strengthening agent. It is administered via IV and lasted about 15 minutes. They started giving this drug to patients like me who are in medically-induced menopause to combat brittle bones. In so doing, they found that it had some protective effects against potential bone metastases. So I'll be doing that once every six months "for the next several years." They said it may cause mild flu-like symptoms, and sure enough, I woke up today feeling a little achey. It'

My last post was a bit of a downer, so I just wanted to do a really short guy to say that I'm a week out from surgery and I'm doing a bit better! Last night we even sat in the park (me in a chair) for hours to celebrate Alan's bday. I saw this dog wearing a rave collar and it really brought up my spirits: Sometimes it's the little things. (Seeing friends in this very isolating climate was also nice.) Love you, you small batch of readers.

Hello friends and readers, I am officially on day 5 of recovery from my exchange surgery, and I am woefully reminded that recovery sucks! I'm in a lot of discomfort in my chest (obviously) and my thighs, where they took some fat to "graft" around my implants. It's not fun. My spirits are pretty low and that will be reflected in this post. I'm frankly annoyed that my doctors made this surgery seem like it was going to be a breeze. What I've slowly learned is that in cancerland, there are varying degrees of awful. Like with the third suite of chemo that I received- sure, it was LESS awful than the literal poison, but its still made me hazy, exhausted, and dehydrated. Sure, this surgery is LESS awful than the one where they took out all of my breast tissue and my tumor, but it's still pretty terrible to have gruesome sutures across your chest and bruising all over your legs. The fact that I've been through worse does not make this any less painful now.

Hello friends, I have been woefully inactive on this blog, mostly because I've been fortunate enough to be able to turn away from cancer for a bit and focus on my dissertation. Of course, I've still been doing my immunotherapy infusions once every three weeks, and have had the stray rough night of tangential aches and pains here and there. But I've mostly been feeling healthy enough to direct my energy towards work and the occasional socially distant gathering. That will have to change tomorrow, though, as I turn my focus back to chugging along in cancerland. I'm writing this brief little post to update anybody out there (hello? is there anybody out there?) that tomorrow is a surgery day. It is finally my exchange surgery, where my plastic surgeon swaps out my temporary tissue expanders for more permanent* implants. The expanders are pretty tight and uncomfortable, and I hear the implants are much more comfy, so I'm relieved to be moving forward with it. The surge

Hello friends and family, I hope you all are doing well. Things, like in most places still under lockdown, are pretty much the same over here.  I am still trying to do work. Greg is still trying to (and succeeding at) baking bread. I go for my treatments once every three weeks, and we go on walks and get to sit outside more as the weather gets nicer. but in general, we are in a vortex of time and a confine of space that in many ways, as I mentioned in my last post, is pretty similar to the last year of my life as a cancer patient. It's been this view, day in and day out: I did reach a pretty big milestone a few weeks back- a year since my diagnosis, or my cancerversary, as folks in the club like to call it. I wish I could say that Greg and I had a big old party and celebrated me still being alive, but if I'm being honest, I was in a funk about it all week. I thought a lot about the ambitious and productive person that I was a year ago, pre-illness.* I got angry reliving

Hello dear friends and readers. These are strange, unsettling times. I am sending you all so so much love and strength, hoping you are doing your best as you cozy up at home, adjust to this new normal, and just generally slow down in the weeks and months ahead. Despite the news out of our fine city being bleak and the sounds of sirens being fairly persistent, we are doing okay over here. I am always working remotely, Greg's office has been closed for nearly two weeks, and will likely remain that way for the next month or two. With Greg about to be put on furlough, we will struggle a bit financially from this, but we are so so privileged to have a safe home, savings, a decent unemployment bill from the federal government, and family help if need be. We're spending our time cooking and making sourdough bread and watching TV and organizing and Facetiming and not getting any 'real' work done, but who cares: The homestead. Homemade sourdough pizza.  Chicken